You know how it is. You watch the President you campaigned for getting sand kicked in his face by the opposition. Over. And over. And over again.
And you begin to think, this guy we elected actually LIKES getting beat up. You think, my God, we elected the first the masochist President.
And then you think, I don't really need to do my run today, or my 50 girly push-ups. You think: there's a pint of Haagen-Daz in my freezer with my goddamn name on it.
That's right. You've become demoralized by watching the monumental pussiness of your Democratic representatives.
But it doesn't have to be this way. Remember that guy, whose name no one in the DNC is allowed to say anymore? The guy dealbreaker.com simply refers to as "N.H.F."?
The former New York State Attorney General, the guy with such big balls that he took on AIG CEO Hank Greenberg, and actually got him fired? The former New York State Attorney General who said epic things, like, "I'm a #$%^%$ STEAMROLLER!" when talking to the thugs who were taking your lunch money and tanking your economy?
Whoo! Good times, those were!
Yeah. You remember that guy. The abrasive guy who actually got things done. The guy so obsessed with justice that even Republican voters actually liked him and voted for him, too. The guy your auntie never liked because he was, well, so in your face. So unpleasantly... male. Well, guess what? That guy is still alive! Hank Greenberg and Roger Stone and Ken Langone didn't actually kill him. Like Bruce Wayne's Batman, he's just been hiding out in the CNN batcave.
And then, because you are an actual adult past the age of 20, you think, "Y'know, a guy with big enough balls to take on Hank Greenberg? It was probably unrealistic that he was going to be able to keep it in his pants 24/7." And then, whether you are married or single, you think what every other longtime married woman would think: "At least he wasn't actually cheating on his wife - it was a contractual arrangement!" How obvious is that?
It's time, America. It's time to bring back Spitzer. We need a guy who can land a punch.
Eva,
ReplyDeleteJust read the above blog. Fabulous! But damn. Now I have to go look up N.H.F.
Haley
You preach it and I'll turn the pages!
ReplyDeleteGreat stuff!
I'm with you. I always liked him. I think he could be the guy. Glad to see you writing about him.
ReplyDelete-SLW
He still tries to fight the good fight with on his CNN show In The Arena, but what a F**CKING waste. He needs real power to do the job that only he will do. No one else is even willing to take on the battles that Spitzer did and win and look where we are now! Taking taxpayer money to further enrich bankers because the same idiots who oversaw the Armageddon are STILL in charge! DRAFT SPITZER!!
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